EMPTINESS

    I feel like I'm reaching out to people. Maybe I'm just a needy bitch.....maybe it's because I was an only child raised in a sea of sibling having cousins....Whatever the reason, no one ever seems to grasp the depth of warmth and love and want that I have for them. Or maybe they DO grasp it, they just don't return it to me. If that is the case,  I can accept it, I just wish they would bluntly put it to me so I would clearly know the problem.

    I think it's easier to accept the fact of feelings not being returned when you just straight up know that that is where you stand.

     I so long to know the feeling of having a sister to fucking fight to the death WITH one day and fight to the death FOR the next, without skipping a breath. I don't think people understand that emptiness.

     I don't understand the emptiness.




APILL